The Caucus Race (Olivia version)
Olivia floated through the tears in the bottle. The sun was rising and Olivia could see what she had literally cried an ocean of tears. Just then, she heard someone singing. She turned and saw an unusual sight. It was an orange alley cat with a white muzzle, underbelly, tip on his tail, and paws, pink ear innards, a black nose, and yellow eyes with a green iris. His name was Thomas O'Malley. He was riding on an Indian sloth bear named Baloo and a blue hornbill named Zazu was pushing him through the sea. O'Malley began to sing again: Thomas O'Malley: Oh, a sailor's life is the life for me How I love to sail on the bounding sea And I never, never ever For the weather never ever does a thing for me Oh, a sailor's life is the life for me Tiddley-um (honks his nose twice) Da dum dee-dee And I never, nev... "Ahoy! And other nautical expressions! Land ho, by Jove!" the cat shouted. Zazu saluted him and said, "Where away, Thomas O'Malley?" "Thomas O'Malley?" Olivia said to herself. "Three points to starboard," O'Malley said. "Follow me, ol' hearties! Have you at port no time at all now, ha-ha! Oh!" "Mr. O'Malley," Olivia called. The cat and horbill sail away, as he began to sing again: O'Malley: Jo-ho-ho And a bottle of sea We love each time... "Please..." Olivia called. "Please help me!" Just then, a black alley cat wearing a black hat and a red bowtie was riding on a boat. His name was Scat Cat. "Um, pardon me, but, uh, would you mind helping me?" said Olivia, but Scat Cat didn't seem to hear her. A canoe passed by. In it were an English cat named Hit Cat, a Russian cat named Billy Boss, a Chinese cat named Shun Gon, and an Italian cat named Peppo. "Yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo! Help me! Please! Help me!" she called. She stood up, causing the bottle to sink temporarily. "Help me!" Olivia cried from underwater. The bottle resurfaced and she saw a group of cats on the shore. Zazu, Scat Cat, and his gang were all running around a rock. O'Malley was on top of a rock and singing: O'Malley: Forward, backward, inward, outward Come and join the chase! All (except Olivia): Nothing could be drier than a jolly caucus race Backward, forward, outward, inward Bottom to the top Never a beginning, there can never be a stop (The water starts to rise again and O'Malley lifts up his campfire to prevent it from going out.) O'Malley: To skipping, hopping, tripping Fancy free and gay I started it tomorrow and will finish yesterday! (The water lowers and, surprisingly, the runners are completely dry.) All (except Olivia): Round and round and round we go And dance forevermore Once we were behind But now, we find we are... (Olivia gets out of the bottle and a wave washes her to the beach.) O'Malley: Forward, backward, inward, outward Come and join the chase! Nothing could be drier than a jolly caucus race. Backward... O'Malley suddenly saw Olivia and said, as he used a cigar to breathe in and out, "I say! You'll never get dry that way!" "Get dry?" asked Olivia, as Zazu bounced off her head. "Have to run with the others," O'Malley answered. "First rule of the caucus race, you know!" "But, how can I-?" Olivia began, before she started to run. "That's better!" O'Malley said, "Have you dry in no time now!" "But no one can ever get dry this way!" Olivia said. "Nonsense!" O'Malley said. "I'm as dry as a bone already!" "Yes, but-" Olivia began, before a wave covered the group again. Olivia saw Archimedes washed up on the beach, riding in an umbrella. He turned it over and was drenched in water. "Alright, boys! Let's head now! Look lively!" The cat said. "The brown pygmy owl!" Olivia exclaimed. "Mister Owl! Mi- Mister Owl!" "Oh my goodness," Archimedes yelled, as he ran off into the wood. "I'm late! I'm late!" "Oh, don't go away!" Olivia shouted. "I'll be right back!" "I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!" Archimedes said. As Olivia ran after the owl, she could still hear the cat talking. "Don't step on the Italian cat!" O'Malley shouted. "Billy Boss, there, watch out now! Stop kicking the Chinese cat! Scat Cat! Hit Cat..." Category:Fan Fiction Category:MisterCartoonMovie Category:Alice in Wonderland Movies Category:Alice in Wonderland Movies Spoof Category:Alice in Wonderland Movie Spoofs